How to find a date in five easy steps 

**The following advice should be taken with several grains of salt.

1.) Be mysterious.

The fastest way to force someone to find you intriguing is to tell only the necessary truths. Did you write a book that made the New York Times Bestsellers list? Good— tell them. Was it Handbook for Mortals? Maybe don’t mention that till you’re married.

2.) Be kind.

People generally like nice people. Complimenting them, asking them about their days, and actually listening when they talk can go a long way toward securing their interest.

3.) But not too kind.

You don’t want to come across as a doormat. Or worse— as boring. It’s okay to crack a joke every once in a while, as long as you aren’t too mean. Or, as long as you also make fun of yourself. People enjoy self-deprecating humor. It’s a senseless but eternal truth. Bonus: if you make fun of yourself first, it won’t hurt as much when they inevitably make fun of you. And honestly, it’s only a matter of time before they do.

4.) Be passionate.

In the most innocent sense of the word, passion is appealing. No one wants to be with someone who lacks drive. On the other hand, make sure the things your passionate about are worthy of your passion. Are you passionate about books? Wonderful. Are you passionate about corncob art? Maybe keep that one to yourself.

5.) Be yourself.

It’s a cliche because it’s an eternal truth. (Unless, of course, your true self isn’t passionate, mysterious, kind or funny.)

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